Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize