dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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