so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Randomize
