Kiss
Puke
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Randomize
