and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Randomize
