Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
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