If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
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