I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
