So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
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He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
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smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
She's not a foreskin expert like you
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
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