Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
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