Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
