please come you make the beer taste better
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Randomize