she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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