Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize
