dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
