those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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