I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
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