they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
