you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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