is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
