1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Randomize
