for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
