i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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