Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
