Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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