i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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