It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
