sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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