The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
