Sponge bath it is.
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
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