oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
