Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Randomize
