it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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