YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Randomize
