I murdered the dance floor call the cops
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
