I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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