saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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