i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
