I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Randomize
