No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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