Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
