omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
