As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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