I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Floor bacon is actually really good
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
