im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Randomize
