Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I deserve this hangover.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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