that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
