Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
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