I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
My feet surprised me
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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