What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Randomize
